How To Manage Stubborn Kids?
Children tend to be stubborn during their childhood and adolescence. It can be part of their personality that parents have to manage, or it can just be a declaration of their freedom to explore and test their limits and do or not do something. Disciplining a stubborn child involves:
- Keeping your cool.
- Listening to and understanding your child.
- Setting a good example of acceptable behavior.
It is essential to teach stubborn toddlers to express themselves and healthily manage stress.
Give Spontaneous Attention Outside of Confrontational Situations
Young children want to be seen. They want to be “me” and be proud of everything they already know. However, your child still needs a lot of help.
A stubborn or frustrated child will get a lot of attention. You can try to calm them down or get angry. The child quickly learns that problematic behavior requires special attention. This is why it is essential to give spontaneous attention to the child outside of confrontational situations as well.
Understand the Child’s Frustrations and Feelings
Children are learning independence and trying to accomplish many things, but in their eyes, they are being held back by the limitations of others and themselves. This can be frustrating for your child. For instance,
- Your child wants to say something but cannot express exactly what they want to say.
- Your child can’t open the cupboard door.
- Don’t touch your sister’s fun toys.
Find out why they are frustrated and try to show understanding.
Set Clear Limits and Teach the Child To Follow the Rules
It is imperative to set limits and learn the rules at this age. This will ensure predictability and provide security and safety for your child. Your child knows in advance what you are going to do, what they must do, and what can be expected of them. However, children may not understand why there are limits.
Children Need Room To Explore
- Apply your rules consistently. Even if your child throws a tantrum, your “no” must remain a “no.”
- Avoid power struggles with your child.
- Think of your rules as challenges (e.g., “Can you brush your teeth by yourself?”).
Guiding a child and regulating their behavior is done primarily to help them grow and develop. Your child will undoubtedly do many things that you will enjoy and many things you will not like. You can respond to all these events and adjust your child’s behavior.
Encourage and Be Patient With Your Child
- Stimulate your child’s growth into an independent person. Give your child room to grow and expand their potential.
- Give your child autonomy in things like eating and washing. In doing so, encourage your child’s independence. Be patient with getting dirty.
- Your child likes to work in the garden, do housework, and take care of animals. The work may progress a little slower, but your child will be learning a lot.
Always Be Available When Your Child Goes Exploring
Children learn about themselves and their environment. This journey of discovery is essential for them to become independent.
When a child knows that there is someone nearby, they will dare to be adventurous. If a child knows that someone will help them if something happens or if they suddenly need someone, they will endure much better.
Have Realistic Expectations
Each child is unique and will grow at their own pace. However, there are a few fixed points that you can expect from your child.
If the child is focused on something for 10 minutes, make sure it is good outcome for him/her.
Keep the message short and precise. Having several commands or questions in one sentence can be confusing or unclear.
Let us know if these tips have helped you in the comments below!