What To Do When Your Kid Announces He’s in Love?
Whether you believe it or not, every human craves attention and it’s completely normal to want that kind of attention from someone. The need to love and to be loved is a life goal; it’s an overpowering feeling and a necessary component that contribute to life’s happiness. There’s absolutely nothing wrong in wanting to love someone, to hold someone in your arms and call them your own. Having someone by your side for support makes you feel happier. After a long tiring day, your soul needs a person to whom you can talk and share your happiness or sadness.
I think love is a power within you; it’s the energy that gives you life. Your mind realizes that without it, you would no longer exist, so it does some amazing things to protect the love you have within you.
However, by the time you are married and have two-three kids, you’d find that love has changed dramatically. Gone is the heart-pulsing feeling and the irresistible attraction. Your mind is no longer soaked with romantic ideas, you are not occupied with the all-absorbing purpose of impressing your partner and you discover that you need some more individual time alone. Personally, I won’t say love decreases after marriage, but as you and your partner are moving into a more mature phase, certain things ought to change and you will no longer feel the same romantic infatuation that you felt first. On the other hand, falling in love at a tender age can make that feeling much more intense.
You were a kid once and I’m assuming you must have had a crush (or more) when you were very young. So, if your kid told you that he/she fell in love, please don’t panic; it’s completely normal to be infatuated at this age. In fact, experts say that around 5 or 6 years old, boys and girls start noticing each other. As they learn more about their respective gender roles, they start wanting to act like grown-ups and thus develop strong feelings for each other. It’s also a phase when children would start being very curious about their bodies and this is why parents should be there to help them go through this critical stage.
So, how exactly should you react if your kid tells you he is in love?
Don’t Shame Your Child About It
Unlike adults, children are extremely sensitive and look at the world differently. They get hurt very easily and every hut plays a crucial role in forming their personality. The hurt caused by shaming, for example, will remain in a child’s memory forever. The child may forget the incident but not the pain caused by the incident.
I’ve known many parents belittling or shaming their kids for falling in love and these kids ended up developing negativity and bitterness as a result of such incidents. As a parent, I understand if you want your kid to focus more on his studies than things like love, but shaming or punishing him for that is the WORST thing a parent can do.
Teenagers tend to hide a ton from their parents, but not kids. Keeping secrets implies deceiving and lying but kids will always feel bad and guilty about keeping things from their parents. So, if your kid told you about his first love, it probably means that he doesn’t want to keep it from you and wants your opinion.
So, instead of reprimanding him, try to be more supportive. You can, for instance, comment about how pretty his crush is or how adorable they look together. By showing your support, you are teaching your kids the value of relationships and love.